Hairy Eyeball

I usually follow a guideline for this Blog which says that it should contain no more than half vintage material, that newly created stuff should be posted alternately with those dusty old slides which I process one by one. But I haven't been able to meet my quota and I am sorry for that. It's winter and even though the weather has been far from snowy or even dreary, I haven't been able to do much of anything artistically. And just recently on Saturday I had a very disappointing setback which I am still dealing with emotionally. I had signed up for a class in making concept and game art which was to take place every Saturday afternoon throughout the winter until early March. But when I went to the art studio where it was to be held, I found that it had been canceled because not enough people (only two) signed up for it.

As you handful of readers and/or friends know, I want to be a professional illustrator/concept artist, and I want my work in digital media to be of the quality that is featured on the (juried) site "CGHub". I want to sell my fantasy art and/or get it published. I also want to do my sequential art, as I have said before. But I realize that for me to get as good as those artists, I need more training in all kinds of drawing and digital work. Most of those young professionals have been to elite art schools in Asia or California. If I had the money and the time, I would go back to art school and learn everything that didn't exist when I was younger, and also do endless life drawing figure studies from real models. (You may remember that I did have the opportunity to draw a live model in the spring of 2011. Why didn't I ask her to do a "pin-up" pose when I had the chance?) I need to find more models to draw, at a time when I am not at work on the day job.

I feel incompetent and out of it, and that's not a good thing because I have one large commission to work on. The frenzy of the "Christmas season" brought no peace on earth nor any good will on my part, just more clutter all over a dwelling which is far too cluttered already, not to mention exhaustion at the day job dealing with long lines at the cash register. Most of my work at Trader Joe's is now working the cash register, not doing signs. The current management wants the signs done in the early morning, and I don't work in the early morning.

I know I'm just making excuses for not making any progress. The managers of the studio suggested I contact the artist who was supposed to teach the class and ask whether he gives private tutoring or classes elsewhere. I sent an e-mail but have not heard back. I am considering doing some online classes but I don't know how that works. There are loads of "tutorials" for digital art and I'm sorry to say that most of them do not tell me what I need to know. I feel as though I am going to have to start all over again studying drawing and painting, this time all on the computer. At this point I have little interest in doing "conventional" painted work, unless the client specifically requests it. Since I am not selling any of my work, I just don't have room to store stacks of paintings on boards or canvas. Works on a hard drive don't take up space or collect dust. Any portfolio of new art will be online, not in a dusty flip book.

So as usual I apologize for not producing quality art product and by-products in the last month or so. I will try to work on sketching my dragons and nude women and a winery here or there. If you want something else artistic from me, just ask. For now, it's just a Hairy Eyeball (done in Photoshop) for you.